Missing You...

Some logs laid there, some bricks lay piled up and there was enough sand; it was the sea shore. All lay uselessly on this empty shore. Some got washed away, and those that were left wanted some miracle.

I lay on this sand, only some low waves came by, and in dream you came to rescue me. My desires grew and clouded my heart and mind. The logs smiled, so did the bricks and sand. I was building a house, your steps made it home. This was our little niche.

In morning, sea dove sings and sun light through the small window, played. The changing colours of sea added colour in our life. We were lost in each other…

I was drowning in my vast ocean of countless desires. Desire to love you! Desire to make you mine! Desire to spend my life with you! Desire to die loving you!

Offf!!!! the phone rings…

Suddenly I got up! It’s your miss call! I checked the time; it was midnight; our time. I was happy.

LITTLE PRINCES SLEEPS

MY SWEET LITTLE PRINCES GO TO SLEEP.
I WILL SOOTH YOUR HAIR AND KISS YOUR FOREHEAD.
I WILL SIT AND WATCH YOU SLEEP,
THESE BEAUTIFUL MOMENTS CAN NEVER BE MISSED.

MY SWEET LITTLE PRINCES GO TO SLEEP.
YOUR WORRIES AND FEAR I WILL KEEP
I WILL GUARD YOU LIKE FATHER
YOU JUST KEEP FAITH IN ME

MY SWEET LITTLE PRINCES GO TO SLEEP.
WHEN YOU WAKE UP, TELL ME ABOUT THE DREAM
THE WORDS WE SHARED AND PROMISES WE MADE
TRY TO KEEP THEM AND NEVER LEAVE ME.

MY MOON

THE SUN HAS SET, BUT STILL THERE IS ENOUGH LIGHT, AND IN THIS LIGHT AND DARKNESS I SEE YOU. LIKE THE MOON YOU SPREAD YOURSELF INSIDE ME. I AM ENLIGHTENED.

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A MOONLIT NIGHT LIKE THIS?
THE BLUE BED SHEET COVERS EVERYTHING ON THIS EARTH,- THE LANDSCAPE, THE GREENERY, HOUSES, AND EVERYOTHER THING.YOU CAN SEE THE SHAPES AND FEEL IT'S SOFTNESS. THIS IS MAGICAL.

HAVE YOU EVER TOUCHED MOON LIGHT? HAVE YOU EVER EXTENDED YOUR HANDS OUT TO EMBRACE HER OR GIVE HER THE CUTE HUG...?
YOU CAN FEEL HER WARMTH WHICH IS SO COOL AND MORE YOU RECEIVE MORE YOU WANT TO HOLD HER TIGHT. BUT YOU CAN NEVER QUITE GET HOLD OF HER.

HAVE YOU TRIED SEEING THE RECEEDING MOON?
A VAIL COVERS ONLY HER FACE EXPOSING ONLY HER FOREHEAD.SHE SEEMS MOST TEMPTING...SHE IS JUST PREPARING TO SLEEP AND YOU ARE WATCHING...

HAVE YOU EVER WATCHED HER PLAYING WITH THE CLOUDS? THOSE CHILDHOOD DAY, PLAYING HIDE N SEEK...AND SAYING 'TOOKIE' FROM ONE CORNOR OF DOOR AND THEN VANISH...

HAVE YOU EVER FELT HER DARKNESS?

OH! ITS SO PAINFUL. YOU KNOW SHE IS THERE BUT SHE CANNOT BE SEEN. YOU CAN ONLY FEEL HER PRESENCE. SHE BECOMES A DREAM OR A MEMORY, YOU CAN NEVER FORGET, YOU DONOT WANT TO FORGET. SHE IS SO... SO...CRUEL...THIS IS WHAT MAKE YOU LOVE HER...THE DISTANCE BRINGS YOU CLOSER, MORE CLOSER TO HER...BUT NOT CLOSE ENOUGH TO REACH HER...


~~~ AFTER THIS FEW HOURS, YOU WILL COME, I'LL SEE YOU AND WE'LL WALK TOGETHER. YOU WILL LIGHT MY WAY AND I WILL FOLLOW...

MY DAD

LET ME STAY WITH YOU DAD...
I WILL BE YOUR GOOD GIRL.
NEVER MAKE YOU MAD,
AND I DON'T WANT ANY PEARL.

DAYS WILL BE BRIGHT AND WARM,
I WILL PLAY AND LAUGH ARROUND.
YOU WILL COME AT NIGHT,
AND TELL ME STORIES OF FIGHT.

I WILL BE YOUR PRINCES,
OR THE FAIRY OF YOUR TALES...
GIVE YOUR WORRIES TO ME FATHER,
I WILL HEAL YOUR PAIN.

I WILL MAKE YOUR BREAKFAST,
AND WAVE YOU AT THE DOOR.
WHOLE DAY I WILL SING TO GOD...
FOR YOUR GOOD HEALTH AND MORE.

I KNOW NO ONE IN THIS WORLD,
WHO WILL LOVE ME LIKE YOU.
AND I KNOW NO ONE IN THIS WORLD,
WHO WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU.

YOU ARE MY WORLD,
YOU ARE MY GOD,
LET ME STAY WITH YOU,
DON'T SEND ME ABROAD.
I WILL ALWAYS BE YOUR GOOD GIRL, DAD...
AND NEVER MAKE YOU MAD.



this is inspired by you.

NIGHT'S CALL

THE SUN HAS SET,
AND THE EVENING APPENDED.
FLOWERS BLOSSOMED BUT...
THE SAD LADY CLOSED HER EYES.

THE BIRDS RETURNED IN THEIR NESTS,
THE COWS MOO FROM THEIR SHED,
AND THE MOON CAME UP WITH,
THE SMILING SHINING STARS.

THE SCENT OF FLOWER HAS SPREAD EVERYWHERE,
IN THIS MOMENT BILASI SAID,...
'WHICH FLOWER WILL YOU CHOOSE?
AND WHAT WEALTH WILL YOU GET?'

THE GODDESS OF SLEEP CAME,
...ON THE TIRED CHILD'S EYES,
WHO RESTS ON HIS MOTHER'S LAP,
IN THE FEET OF THE GODDESS,
ALL REST IN PEACE.

DAYS COME AND PASS

DAYS COME AND PASS,
TIME GIVES A CURVED SMILE...
I KNOW NOT WHEN I WILL SEE YOU,
ALONE I TRAVEL MY MILE.

DAYS COME AND PASS,
I HEAR WORDS THAT YOU NEVER SAY...
I KNOW NOT IF YOU REALLY LIKE ME,
OR IS IT ONLY ME THIS WAY.

DAYS COME AND PASS,
YOU NEVER GIVE A CLUE...
I KNOW NOT WHAT TO DO,
SO I WAIT FOR YOU.

DAYS COME AND PASS,
I ALWAYS TRY TO UNDERSTAND YOU...
LIKE A RIDDLE YOU SEEM,
I WILL SOLVE IT ONE DAY AND WILL GET YOU.

Road...

Sound of wind coming from far,
Road was empty...
Like poisonous snake laid on the earth,
With black, yellow, white scar!
The more I walked, more it turned...
Bended and twisted had me burned.
A puzzle that could not be solved,
Was before me and I revolved!
Tired with pain and anger I sat down,
Felt that same shade once around.
I opened my eyes to see the world,
From inside someone called-
Do you know what you want?
Blank I was, with numbness all around!

Prayer To Thee My Lord

This is my prayer to thee, my lord- strike, strike at the root of penury in my heart.

Give me the strength lightly to bear my joys and sorrows.
Give me the strength to make my love fruitful in service.
Give me the strength never to disown the poor or bend my knees before insolent might.
Give me the strength to raise my mind high above daily trifles.
And give me the strength to surrender my strength to thy will with love.

...From Gitanjali

Hi Jonny,

Remember that dark night, we shivered and ran… ran miles, cold air pinching like thousand needles. That bloody night… that cold body of Bob… the water of the fountain, becoming red… my head spinning and lips becoming white…

Remember?

Remember those days, the dusty abandoned church! Our hideout… Remember the pretty morning mist…gold and silver… ’ Why it can’t stay all the time?’, you asked.

‘Nothing go can stay…
Nature’s first screen is gold…
Her heart is here to hold…
Her early leaves, a flower…
But only someone knows…
They least obsessed to live…
So it isn’t said to grief…
So dawn goes down today…
Nothing gold can stay…’

Remember this Jonny…

Gone with the wind into the hills and dales, your soul, but you seem to be so near…

Missing You…
Ponny Boy…

Today, I have seen an excellent movie: ’The Outsider’… In this, Jonny and Ponny Boy are good friends. Jonny dies saving some children off fire. This letter is my reaction, as Ponny Boy.

My Last Moment

I have always heard... your entire life flashes in front your eyes, the second before you die… First of all, that one second isn’t a second at all, it stretches on forever like an ocean of time.

For me it was like lying on my back at the boy’s scout camp, watching falling stars, yellow leaves from maple trees that lined our streets, my grandmother’s hands and the way her skin seemed like paper and the first time I saw my cousin, Tony’s brand new Fire Bird. And Jenny…. And Jenny… My little angel… And Charoline…

I guessed I would be pretty pissed off for what had happened to me…

But it’s hard to stay mad when there is so much beauty in the World. Sometimes I feel, I am saying it at once and it’s too much. My heart fills up like a balloon that’s about to burst. And then I remember to relax and stop trying to hold on to it. And then it flows through me like rain. And I can’t feel anything, but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life.

You have no idea, what I am talking about, I am sure. But, don’t worry! you will, someday…


… From American Beauty

I found these lines so very beautiful that I couldn’t stop myself to share…

You can come but can never leave...

Today on my way to office, I was looking out to the hills far away! When I fell drowsy and started dreaming, with eyes half closed, I don’t remember.

I was walking on sands, I noticed. There was sound of waves from far. I realized it was seashore. Walking seemed difficult in the scorching sun, I felt dizzy. So I slowed down.
A cool breeze started blowing. The wind carried a distinct scent. I was delighted, yet calm. Then I saw you. With your heart losing smile adorned with that ‘til’ on your chin, you were my angel. My world changed!

We did not speak. We walked together. There was some battle in the heavens so the sky was red and losing its blue. The birds could not accept this and hurried home. The sun was tired and let himself float on the sea. Far away a fishing trolley was returning.

The waves touched our ankles and sometimes a bit higher, and occasionally our hands touched. We did not hold hands but when touched we tried to adhere. I entered into someone’s world. Here I feared no-one. We walked and walked in this wonderland.

The sky turned dark, moon seemed soothing, and the waves played its ever continuing music. I felt like kissing you. We laid on the sand and enjoyed the magic. This world seemed so simple yet so beautiful. There were no tensions, no burdens, no explanations required, only a promise to make: “We will not part, we will be together forever and ever”

Suddenly someone pushed me hard, you were not there. The promise was broken before being made. I lost you. I was alone again!

I got down from the bus and entered the office gate!

AM I CRAZY..

LET ME SEE YOU...
LET ME LOOK AT YOU...
YOU JUST SIT BESIDE ME...
TIME WILL WAIT TILL I MOVE MY EYES... WHICH I CANNOT...
DAYS, MONTHS, YEARS WILL PASS...
BUT WE WILL BE AGELESS...

LET ME TOUCH THE WIND THAT TOUCHES YOU...
LET ME INHALE ITS FRAGRANCE...
LET ME FEEL ITS WARMTH AND DEPTH...
SO WHAT WE ARE FAR...
WIND WILL KEEP US NEAR...

WHY I TALK TO MYSELF...
WHY I GET ABSENT MINIDED...
WHY I SEE YOU IN EVERY FACE...
WHY I WAIT...
YOU ARE LEADING ME CRAZY...

LET ME BE OCCUPIED WITH YOUR THOUGHT...
LET ME TRAVEL WITH YOU AS I AM LOST...
LETS HOLD HANDS AND WALK...
AM I DREAMING...
I WANT TO DREAM FOREVER AND NEVER WAKE UP...

What Life is?

Who knows what life is?
It's like a running train... with joy and sorrow as different stations, only with different names.
Who knows what life is?
It can be a holiday trip to earth...Moving on, playing your parts as a child, student, boy friend, husband...***Condition applied:: some characters can be skipped...
Visiting places, site seeing, knowing the place called earth and fellow kinds (complex though)...
But the end is inevitable...
As a train must reaches its destination, so shall once life comes to an end... The journey is over and you must return... to where you belong...

Now the question is:
How should your journey end?
What impact you leave on your fellow kind?
How people will know you?

....These are relative questions...Very easy to forecast but too hard to deliver!

So, don’t think, take every moment a surprise…Enjoy life don’t drag it!

About Me...

I was walking down a lonely road; saw a man whose face cannot be seen…
He said: “Move on! Travel your miles and U may reach the river, to start another journey!”
“Well!” : I said, “when my journey will end?”
The man is gone, my question unanswered!
I knew this will never end…